A Year Ago

A lot of APs do these "year ago" posts. We've had a busy week and I didn't have my computer with me last weekend when we passed a significant milestone in our journey to be parents. On May 25, 2007, I met my daughter, Gabriella, for the very first time. I was alone. Ed did not arrive until the next day. I don't remember being scared or nervous. I remember feeling in awe of that little miracle. Every inch of her was beautiful and lovely. She already had a big personality and even bigger hair. I remember feeling incredibly proud to be her mother as I walked around the hotel.

But one year ago today was the last full day that I had with Gabi on that first trip. I know that I thought that I would be okay to leave her the next day if I just didn't think about it in the meantime. I remember mourning the passing of our sweet Karen who died only a month earlier as I learned more details of her situation. I remember being so grateful that Kristin was there with me. I was tired, in love, sad and humbled all at the same time.

I remember the next day when Kristin and I gave our girls back to Mariela. We cried as we watched them drive away. We laughed at the absurdity as we saw Mariela put Reagan in her lap (no CARSEAT!) and pull away from us. And then we cried. And then we laughed. And I remember thinking that after that week I would never be the same. How far we have come in this year! How blessed we are!